Cant slp......dun ask me why? Jus cant put myself to slp at all....lie down on the bed looking at dear i started to cry w/o any reasons.......actually got laa....think of some nonsense again lor....=x
i started to rem dat special day dunno dear still can rem or nt.....the day dat i made him so panicked n worried over me.....yeah its was the 16th of July....maybe the rest hv forgotten abt it....but i noe onli me n dear still rem it very well....cos i made a stupid mistake on dat day.....which made dear almost lost me.....
till nw....i dunno why i made the choice of leaving him....maybe i was thinking i cant give the kind of happiness he need....i cant give him the future he looking for.....i onli gave him burdens n burdens no happiness but sorrows n headaches......but whenever i rem wat he said on dat day....i felt dat he love me as much as i love him.....no lesser than i do....jus dat he nv show it at all....its deep inside his heart......
I still nt certain if i am still the right choice for him....will he be happier wif mi or w/o me? maybe kind of stupid to think of all these.....but when someone loves another.....its nt whether u possess him or nt....its to see him /her happy u will feel happy too even if he /she izzit gg to be wif u or nt.....of course i am happy he is wif me always.....whenever i need him....
in my mind i kept worried abt a lot of stuff esp when baby coming out soon....makes mi think even more.....i noe he loves me n baby very much....jus scare dat things r too much for him to handle rite nw.....too much stress on him he might break down which he nv did cos he is always so happy-go-lucky......maybe i shld be like him.....worry less think less n be happy.....nv put a worry face in front of ppl at all times.....
He is the onli one i love rite nw n till 4ever......nothing gg change this cos i noe he loves mi as much as i love him too.....more n more but nv less....=p